Venting again.....

Cause I just gotta let it out!!! I have a friend who I love dearly, but she calls me just about every other day and asks me the same question...how are you today? Well I am at a loss as how to respond anymore, I usually say I'm fine (I'm not in a very talkative mood) then she will say you don't sound fine. Well what am I suppose to say? No matter what I say she says it's all going to be fine, things will work out, God isn't going to leave you now look at all you've been through with your kids.....

I understand, I don't feel like I should ask God for anything, I mean after all did He not already give me two wonderful walking and talking miracles.... I know people go through trials and tribulations and it's always easier for those looking in from the outside and those on the inside just can't seem to see inside.

I never wanted to be the mother to tell her kids there isn't anything for them to snack on ( you can have some bread and water). I think above all I hate it the most for my kids. I know that when and if we get to the other side of this storm they will (if nothing else) will have a great appreciation for the things we do have and never to take them for granted again.....Well one can hope that is what they will take away from this all. It hasn't sank in for one of them yet. I will say that my poor Nater he was always and will always be a worrier. He worries more now about all sorts of things. I told him the other day that is not your job that is mommy's job.

I know what ever will be will be and it will be in His time and it's all in His hands....but sometimes I just want to feel the way I feel and have NO ONE tell me how to feel............
Sorry had to vent and get some things off my chest, the stress of it all gets to me! Going to bed.

Goodnight,